Little miss dangerous is on the naughty list

I have been way too naughty these days. I have been craving some fun and escape lately. Tis the season for stress and lots of anxiety. I have been trying to get my Christmas cards done and thinking about the holiday budget and trying to get my shopping done. It just seems to be such a crazy time of the year. It's hard to believe that Dec. 1st is tommorow! Time to start opening the advent calenders and counting down the days til Christmas. I was given permission yesterday to have a little bit of fun. Master was taking the kids to a double karate night and I had time to have a few drinks and enjoy some time on the webcam with Griz and good girl. We hung out and I enjoyed their company a lot. I wore my little miss dangerous t-shirt so they could see how it looked on me. They got it for my birthday for me this year. I noticed my father-in-law had some pretty wild eyes when he came to pick up the kids for karate. His eyes went directly down to my tits and I'm pretty sure it was obvious to him that I wasn't wearing a bra. ;) I enjoyed hanging out on the webcam with them. At times it was hard to keep my t-shirt and clothes on. The alcohol turns me into a very naughty girl and I can't help but flash my tits or talk to others when I am naked. I know I needed a spanking last night for all my very naughty behavior. :) I spent a bit of time looking through the archives of Everything Goes and got aroused reading the different posts and seeing the sexy pictures of Griz and good girl. I would have loved to get more naughty but it was time to go when Master Anakin and the kids came home. I got off the webcam and went onto msn and starting chatting with my friend, Shasta. I had a few too many drinks at that point and was in a very naughty mood. Alcohol always goes straight to my pussy. Little miss dangerous had come out and I was in a very playful mood. I flirted with her and we talked about how much I needed to get laid. I was wondering how delicious her pussy tasted and got her to ask Jack for me. mmmm...I fantasize a lot about her pussy a lot and just thinking about it gets me soooo worked up!! Master Anakin had come home at this point and I told him that Shasta had mentioned how bad I needed to be fucked. He said it would be his pleasure to fuck me. Of course I had some doubts about it as he usually goes to bed early and is snoring by the time I am ready to have fun. So he decided to make me a bet. A very naughty bet... He said that he would stay awake so he could fuck me. If he did, then I was not allowed to orgasm. Keep in mind that I was extremely aroused at this point during my chat with Shasta. He said I would not be allowed to orgasm until tonight. (Friday night) If he fell asleep however, I could use the Hiatchi as much as I wanted and have as many orgasms as I wanted while he was sleeping. I had full permission for it. The bet was on!! He decided that he was on a mission to win the bet and started to switch his beer for caffeine and started to put the kids to bed early. I waited for him and sure enough...he came downstairs after they were asleep ready to fuck me! I did pout a little but he didn't give into me. I got fucked nice and hard and then sent to bed. My clit felt like it was on fire...I wanted to have an orgasm sooooo bad!! *pouts* What a mean old man! But he won the bet and that was the deal. I woke up this morning still feeling so aroused. Master Anakin has asked for an overnight tonight so I am hoping (cross my fingers) that we get it. I would love to play with him and I can't wait to have an orgasm! I've got a naughty weekend ahead whether we get the overnight or not. We plan to play tonight and I am going out with my friend, Max on Sunday for the day. We plan to go for lunch and head back to his place. This time he asked me to bring out a few of my toys to show him. Soooo...that could make for some naughty fun I hope. :) I saw this Christmas meme on Eva's blog and wanted to give it a try. Change all the answers so that they apply to you and post it to your blog. 1. Wrapping paper or gift bags? Most are wrapped but occassionally I will give a gift bag. 2. Real tree or artificial? Artificial. 3. When do you put up the tree? Usually the end of November. It's up now and looks great. :) 4. When do you take the tree down? Usually right before New Year's eve. I am usually tired of it by then. 5. Do you like eggnog? Yes, especially if it has rum in it. lol. :) 6. Favorite gift received as a child? My walkman. I used it everywhere that I walked to. In those days, I played tapes. LOL. Now it's an Ipod that I walk with. 7. Do you have a nativity scene? Yes 8. Hardest person to buy for? Master Anakin. He has the credit card so if I charge anything I have to ask him and he finds out what I am buying. I am also trying to find the perfect give to give to him that is special and unique. That gets harder each year. 9. Easiest person to buy for? Skywalker. He's at the perfect age with wanting Spiderman stuff and video games and lego. I have had no problems finding him presents. 10. Worst Christmas gift you ever received? A very tacky sweater that I never wore 11. Mail or email Christmas cards? I do both. I like to do mail as it's more personal but I will still do email too. 12. Favorite Christmas movie? National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation. I asked that same question in our poll on the side bar. There is still time to vote! 13. When do you start shopping for Christmas? In October or November. I am about half done right now. 14. Have you ever recycled a Christmas present? I have given someone a used book but they knew it was used and they wanted to read it. I had it laying around so I offered to send it with their gift. 15. Favorite thing to eat at Christmas? Anything with chocolate! 16. Clear lights or colored on the tree? colored LED's 17. Favorite Christmas song? Santa Baby - Madonna 18. Travel for Christmas or stay home? Stay home. I like to be in my own home to celebrate Christmas. I never liked travelling during the holidays. 19. Can you name all of Santa's reindeer? Nope 20. Angel on the treetop or a star? A beautiful star :) 21. Open the presents Christmas Eve or morning? We always open one present on Christmas eve after going to church for the Christmas eve service. 22. Most annoying thing about this time of year? Line-ups!! I can't stand them. I went to Wal mart nice and early this morning to avoid the big line-ups. I enjoy shopping when it's peaceful and quiet and not with people pushing and shoving. I find that other shoppers can get very rude at this time of the year. Master does not like the parking this time of the year. We tend to drive around for a very long time just to get a spot at the mall or wal mart on the weekends. 23.. What I love most about Christmas? I love to spend time with Master Anakin and our children and see Christmas through their eyes. My kids bring me great joy at this time of the year. May the force be with you all!! Have a naughty weekend! ~padme amidala

Happy HNT - Candy cane cropping

Happy HNT everyone! I hope everyone had a chance to check out my post yesterday about my punishment and play with Master Anakin. I shared some spanking pictures on there which showed how red and sore my ass was after he finished with it yesterday. Today we have another spanking picture to share for HNT. This one was taken last year during the Christmas holidays. Master Anakin and I both think it's very cute and holiday themed to get everyone in the Christmas spirit. I am wearing my cute candy cane panties and they are pulled down for a cropping. The crop is one of my favorite toys. I love the little hand on the end of it and how it can make my ass nice and red for Master. I have different themed panties for holidays and special occassions. I wear my "spank me" panties when I am in a naughty mood. I wear my candy cane panties when I am in the Christmas mood. I've got Halloween themed panties and all kinds of different thongs and such. I always like to surprise Master and enjoy his reactions to the different kinds of panties I wear. It always keeps things interesting and naughty. :) Speaking of naughty...that is the mood that I am in today. I've had so many naughty fantasies and thoughts. The problem has been...finding someone to play with me. Master is at work during the day and I am home alone. I've got my days free and the house free and I'm horny and naughty and want to play. I am not sure though who to ask. I admit I've been thinking about Master R a lot lately. We used to talk about what it would be like to have both of my kids in school so my days would be free. I know how easy it would be to call him up and have him come play with me on the level that I crave. He knows those dark fantasies that I like to live out. He knows how to Dom me, how to spank me, how to fuck me...just how to get me to cum so hard and fast. Sometimes I really miss playing with him. He used to tell me "I am just a phone call away." I am not sure if he still is but I often wonder what would happen if I phoned him up and asked him to cum play with me. I feel very lonely when I go use the Hiatachi by myself during the day. I want to play with someone. I wasn't sure who would play with me today and I pouted to Master who was at work. He offered to play with me on the phone. He said he was just about to go on a break and that he would phone me on the cell phone as soon as he could get some privacy. So I read some blogs and waited for his phone call. He phoned me and told me to go upstairs and get naked for him. I loved hearing his voice and could hear the horniness in his tone and yet dominance. He was firm with what he wanted me to do while he was listening. I was to grab the Anakin's paddle and spank myself. He told me to put down the phone and give myself 20 hard paddles on each ass cheek. He told me that it better be hard and if he didn't feel it was, he would give them to me in person tonight. I made sure that I paddled myself hard. I knew he was on the other line listening. I wondered if he was hard. Did he enjoy being on the cell phone with his wife and slave listening to the paddling? I was hoping he was pleased. He then told me to put two clothespins on my nipples and to turn my Hiatchi on. He wanted me to spread my legs for him and to masturbate with the Hiatchi. As I masturbated, he told me a very naughty story about what he wanted to do to me. Does anyone want to hear it? It didn't take me long listening to the very naughty story and his voice and then he told me to cum for him and I exploded. I could tell by the sound in his voice that he was very turned on by it all. He then told me I was a good little slut and that he was going to get me to suck his cock tonight in exchange for giving me my orgasm today. mmmm...something to look forward to later. :) We hope you all enjoy the HNT picture and we would love to hear from you. Please leave us a comment or e-mail. Are you getting ready for the holidays? Anyone else in a naughty mood today? I saw this video on You tube and I laughed and I kept meaning to put it up. What do you think? Can you just imagine? May the force be with you all!! ~padme amidala

Tuesday morning punishment and play

I am sitting here this morning sipping on my Starbucks coffee and with a very sore ass. It's amazing how getting spanked so hard got me feeling centered again and I feel happy and content. This morning I got a really big surprise when Master Anakin decided to stay home and deal with some mouthy behavior from me last night. I admit that I was out of control last night. A build up of stress and sexual frustration led to me losing it on Master Anakin. It brought Darth Vader out for a visit. I pushed him and called him names and got him very angry with me. Darth Vader and little miss dangerous make an explosive combination sometimes. The kids were asleep and I really wanted to fuck. We havn't fucked since our River Rock Hotel anniversary night almost two weeks ago. We had planned on having some play on Friday but my period came early and ruined our plans. He was tired though and wanted to go to bed. So I freaked out. I was a mad horny bitch who wanted to be fucked and I was angry that he wanted to sleep instead of fuck. We fell asleep angry with one another and he refused to fuck me. "If your going to be a bitch, I'm not going to fuck you" he told me and he drifted off to bed. Boy was I worked up!! I was so angry at him and it took me a while to get to bed. I was surprised to notice he was home this morning and not at work. He told me that he planned to drive the kids to school so I didn't have to walk and also he felt we needed to talk. He got that look in his eye. He didn't say a word to me but I knew what he was thinking. I can read his mind sometimes when he gets the look of Darth in his eyes. We got the kids ready and he left to drive them to school. My heart started to beat really fast at that point. I just knew there was a spanking coming. I knew it was going to be punishment for the way I acted last night. I knew I deserved it too. I was a really bad girl and said some horrible things to him in my anger and frustration. I was very embarrased by my behavior. I sat by the fireplace and waited for him to come home. When I heard him walking up those stairs I could hear him unbuckling his belt. "Upstairs now." he said to me in a very firm tone. We went up to our bedroom and I put out a pillow at the end of the bed and got over it and he lifted my night shirt. I made sure I was not wearing any panties. He laid into my ass with his belt many times. I squealed and squirmed under the strokes of his belt. At times I didn't think I could stand it anymore!! The strokes of his belt were mean and hard and I thought about begging for him to stop but I knew I deserved it so I tried to take it as well as I could for him. I was hoping it would be enough to please him. You can see how marked and welted and red my poor bottom was after the punishment from his belt. If you look close in that picture of my red ass, you can see his belt laying nearby. Click to enlarge photos. He stopped at one point and put his fingers into my pussy. He took a picture of it which I am sharing with everyone today. I think it's a very naughty picture. *smiles* He stuck his finger into my pussy which was soaking wet and my ass felt like it was on fire from the punishment. "Well...what do we have here" he said as his felt my wetness. "Naughty girl likes her punishment. Doesn't she?" he teased me. I heard him getting out of his clothes and he came up from behind and fucked me very hard up my pussy. He didn't need lubricant as my pussy was soaking wet. That punishment was enough to get me so worked up and deeply horny!! It didn't take me long to cum for him and shortly after I did, he came up my pussy. He used his magic fingers to make me cum so hard that my body shook from head to toes. mmmmm...what an explosion!! We laid there panting and worn out from our orgasms. I laid in his arms for a few minutes just feeling close to him. He stroked my hair and told me that he was leaving for work and that I had something think about. He said to think about the punishment every time I sat on my sore ass today. He wanted me to post pictures from it and post about my punishment and our morning together. Our force feels strong...things feel back on track again and it feels really good :) Nothing like a very sore ass to make for a really well adjusted attitude. :) Master ordered me one of my Christmas presents from our online store, Darkside Digital Arts this morning. He wanted me to see what is coming to me. It's a "Bad Pussy" t-shirt that I wanted so bad and was on my Christmas list. I'm so excited!! Thank you Master for a very special Christmas present! I am so excited to get it in the mail for Christmas. I know that sometimes I can be a very bad pussy. :) May the force be with you all!! ~padme amidala

On the naughty list

Master told me that I am on the naughty list this Christmas. And that means many spankings coming to me. We went shopping at IKEA today for Christmas presents and I saw two very big wooden spoons in a pack. Of course I see them and automatically think "mmm...those would be so wicked to spank my ass with." Master had a big smile and had the same idea. He put them into our cart and not a word was spoken between us. I really don't think he was going to get them for me for Christmas to cook with. More like...to warm up my bottom nice and red for him. :) I hope everyone has had a chance to check out and vote on our new Christmas poll on our side bar. We have been enjoying the feedback and curious of what your favorite Christmas movie is. Are you getting ready for Christmas? Today Master is outside getting our outside lights up. We bought some new LED lights last year that look awesome and we are excited to get them up today so our holiday decorating is all done and we can enjoy all the sparkling lights and holiday spirit. We weren't able to get them up yesterday due to an unexpected visit from my brother. I am posting a picture today that was taken last year. I can remember that play night so well. I wore my very sexy naughty outfit for Master. I had a very cute holiday look. I dressed up in my leather skirt, cupcake shirt, red sexy thigh-hi's with holiday bows and my white high heels. I also wore my Christmas candy cane panties for Master. I remember he cropped me hard that night and us playing in front of our fireplace. On cold nights I love to make love by the fireplace and get close to Master. It is so warm and comforting and I love the heat from it and our bodies while we make love. So tell me...are you on the naughty list this year too? What kinds of kinky things do you want from Santa this year? I'd love to hear from you.... May the force be with you all!! ~padme amidala

Christmas Quiz

You Are Vixen Sexy and sultry, you're the one all the other reindeer dream about. Why You're Naughty: That fur pulling spat you got into with Dancer over Santa. Why You're Nice: Because even when you're nice, you're still delightfully naughty! Which of Santa's Reindeer Are You?

New Christmas poll

Master Anakin and I had a very quiet anniversary last night. We celebrated our 11 year anniversary of being together by doing lots of cuddling on the couch watching CSI Miami with the marathon going on yesterday. We had a special dinner and we enjoyed just being with one another. Today looks like another quiet day. We don't have any sitting and we are hoping to get our Christmas lights on outside. We have our tree up and decorations inside but we have yet to do the outside of our townhouse. Our neighbors all seem to have theirs out and it's time to work on ours today. We even took our kids to see Santa a few days ago. Leia told us it was "not cool" to have to sit on Santa's knee. I had to bribe her to get her picture taken with Skywalker with Santa. I wanted one last year with both of my kids in the picture. She was worried that someone would spot her on Santa's knee and she looked like she wanted to be anywhere but there during the picture taking. Master pointed out to me Santa's big black belt and asked me if I wanted him to spank me. Of course I wanted a spanking. When don't I want one? lol. I am normally not excited about Christmas but this year is going to be a bit different for us because of one major reason. We get Leia for the whole Christmas this year. Usually the holidays are split with her Dad (my ex husband) and we don't get both of kids for Christmas dinner. My ex isn't taking her til boxing day. I'm very grateful that he is giving us one year with both of our children for the whole holiday. We have all kinds of plans of fun family activities with our kids for the holidays. I already found out one of my Christmas presents which is a pretty big one. My mom has offered me free airfare to go visit her in Florida. I am not sure when I will be flying out to see her but that's very exciting. I wish that Master Anakin and my kids could come too though. I don't think I want to see Disney World without them. Of course if my mom wants to take me to Miami though...that's another story. It's always been a dream of mine to see Miami. I wonder if Crockett is living out there or maybe Horatio Caine from CSI Miami. mmm... Thank you for voting in our latest poll. We asked you what you would like Santa to bring you. 55% of you voted for spanking impliments. Good choice. :) I know of a few spanking impliments I am hoping that Santa will bring me. *smiles* 25% of you said sexy lingerie and bondage equipment. Looks like it might be a kinky Christmas for some people out there. :) We put up a new poll today. Please vote! The poll is on our sidebar. We asked you to vote on your favorite Christmas movie. Which movie have you watched over and over again and is one of your favorites to watch through the holidays? I voted for National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation. We always watch that movie close to Christmas and it makes me laugh time and time again. My kids get so excited when we put that movie on and sit by our fireplace with our tree twinkling and our favorite family movie on to get us in the holiday mood. Let us know what your favorite one is. :) Have you started your Christmas shopping yet? We plan to hit the mall again sometime this weekend to get some more done. It's hard to shop for Leia. She's so picky about clothes and those pre-teen years are hard to know what to buy for her which she will like. Skywalker is a bit easier to shop for being 6 years old. We always like to buy him some Star Wars stuff as he loves that, just like his Dad. :) Please make sure to check out Darkside Digital Arts for your holiday shopping. There are some really neat gift ideas from t-shirts to mugs or kinky stuff. There are some really cool Christmas t-shirts on there too which be great to wear during the holiday season. It is good to order it early as it allows time to ship it off in time for Christmas. The picture I put up today that says "you're on the naughty list" with Santa is from one of our Christmas t-shirts. So cute. There is no doubt in Master Anakin's mind that I am on the naughty list this year. :) I hope everyone is having a good weekend. May the force be with you all!! ~padme amidala

Happy 11 year anniversary Master!

I woke up on November 23, 1996 like any other day. I had no idea that the decision I made that day would affect the rest of my future. That it would affect many lives. After 7 years of friendship, I decided to sit Master Anakin down and tell him the truth. I had been covering up my feelings for him for a long time. We had dated in 1991 but we broke up and remained best friends. He was there for me as my best friend to see me get married and have a baby and other important life events. I watched him date other women and can remember the day he told me he lost his virginity. I always carried a deep part of my heart for Master Anakin. It was hard for me as I truly felt like I loved two men. I was married to my husband and we had a life together and I was not prepared to leave that marriage even though we were having a lot of problems at the time. I knew I couldn't ignore my other feelings going on for Master Anakin. I was struggling so much inside. Do I tell him that I love him and risk our friendship? Would he understand or feel the same? I had no idea. He had buried his feelings for me so deep that I didn't know how he felt about me. I will never forget the look on his face when I told him I loved him. The surprise and happiness when he told me he felt the same and loved me too. I told him that he should leave that night before something might happen but it was too much to hold back. We made love for the first time that night. 7 years of build up between us made for an incredible night of passion. When he left that night I was so extremely happy but also scared. I wondered what would happen to our friendship. What if we could never be together and we would have to keep it a secret? Could I really leave my marriage and the life I had created with my husband, B? We had a daughter together and I didn't want to rip apart our family. I still had feelings for B too and I didn't know how to tell him about what had happened. I was torn and confused. For six weeks we kept our relationship a secret. I kept it a secret from my husband and friends and family. I had a very intense passionate affair with Master Anakin. We had hot hotel sex (that wonderful night at the Hyatt) and we made love at every opportunity we could. I couldn't ignore the magic between us. It was so strong and had gotten a hold of me. It felt like my marriage was crumbling and my own parent's marriage also at the same time. I finally told B and he left on Feb. 1/1997. Master Anakin moved in and we started our life together. There were a lot of people who had many opinions and said it wouldn't last. It's funny how those people who said that are not in their own marriages anymore and yet Master Anakin and I are together. I know we proved a lot of people wrong. 11 years has come and gone so fast. So much has happened and the journey still continues. I have no doubt that I will be with Master Anakin forever. He is my soulmate and my one and only true love. I don't regret that decision 11 years ago to tell him I loved him. I knew what was in my heart and I couldn't deny it. I love our Skywalker family and the life we have created together. Two years ago for our 9 year anniversary I got his mark on my flesh. He tattooed his Phantom of the opera mask into my ankle with the roses. Last year for our ten year anniversary we went and saw Lindsay Buckingham in concert and drove around Stanley Park. This year we had our River Rock night last weekend. Today I celebrate my love for the man who is my true Jedi and force.... Happy 11 year Anniversary Master Anakin!! Today's video and song is going out to you. It's called Don't Let go By En Vogue. That song reminds me so much of that night we first made love and I told you how I felt about you. The lyrics really speak to me from that time of what I was feeling for you. I truly, deeply love you..... your slave xoxoxo ....... I wrote out this post in advance for today and wanted to add a bit more onto this post today. This has been a really tough month for Master and I. I really hope that things will get better soon. Yesterday was a very rough day for us both. I had a really bad fight with DL about our daughters. I am not looking forward to seeing DL later today down at the school to talk about it all. We are both feeling upset right now over this situation with our kids. Grandma A's 94th birthday is this weekend and she continues to get worse. There is lots of family stress and things happening. I havn't been great company lately and dealing with a very bad depression. On top of it all....I got my period yesterday and I had planned a really romantic and naughty play night tonight for our anniversary. I'm glad that we at least had the River Rock night last Saturday and went with my instincts of trying to plan it earlier. This weekend is looking like it's going to be a bust. No sitting and a bad period happening and lots of family stress going on. I hope that Master and I can go ahead with our plans for dinner tonight which I planned to cook for him and the movie we planned to watch at least. I have that really nice bottle of wine to open and I would like to spend some time together with him. No matter what stress is happening in our lives...I hope he knows that I love him and that he is my rock through it all. I still want to celebrate this special day tonight. 11 years together and a love that has grown ...our force is strong. May the force be with you all!! ~padme amidala

Happy HNT - Sassy Pink Schoolgirl

Happy HNT everyone. I hope you enjoy this week's HNT photograph. The story behind the image: My padme dressed up in such a hot outfit, a mixture of sexy and sassy, innocent and evil for our anniversary on the weekend. Her pink tartan schoolgirl skirt, pink thong, crossbones stockings and schoolgirl shoes and her Little Miss Dangerous t-shirt from the Darkside Digital Arts t-shirt store, and a sassy attitude to boot. She wore her hair in cute ponytails to complete the naughty look. I decided it would be a great idea to march her into the basement and lift up that cute little skirt and paddle that sassy bottom of hers. So down we went, paddle and camera equipment in hand, and Little Miss Dangerous sat on the desk watching me set up the tripod and then with me holding the paddle in my hands, she started making sassy, mouthy comments. I snapped this picture in an unplanned moment just before I was finished setting up. I think it captures her sassyness just perfectly, hands on her hips and legs crossed just so. Why is it that she gets so sassy when she's about to get spanked? She just can't resist a snarky "What-ever!" sometimes. Then leaning over the desk she went, of course, the paddle smacking her bottom again and again, loud echoes of the strokes dancing around the basement, the sassy schoolgirl lurching forward and letting forth unsupressable gasps and moans. I photoshopped in a lens flare to cover up her face for privacy's sake (imagine a sassy look), put in a pure black background, and changed the color of the desk to something much more sexy than the original desk colors to compliment her outfit. Remember to click on the image to enlarge it. I hope you enjoyed this weeks HNT photo. Please leave us a comment or drop an email. We always love to hear from you. May the Force be with you, always. Anakin Technorati Tags: HNT, Little Miss Dangerous, erotica, erotic photography, schoolgirl, spanking

My Christmas wish list

It's been a pretty interesting day so far. I went out to Tim Hortons this morning with my friend, DL. I admit I was a bit worried about going out with her today. Our daughters who are the same age are not getting along right now and had some fights happening. I was surprised when DL opened up to me that she is experiencing the same problems with her daughter that I have been having with Leia lately. Leia has been a real handful...full of those pre-teen hormones and mood swings. I have told Master that I almost wish she would just start her period as it's like pms everyday right now. Everything seems to set Leia off and she gets mouthy and moody with everyone. This is all new to me...dealing with a pre-teen with the wild hormones going on. Leia wants to date and she's only 12 years old. She's got a cell phone already even! She has started lying and keeping secrets. That innocent little girl has changed a lot in the last few months especially. It's like I don't recognize her anymore. She tries to act way older than she is. She is already wanting to date! She is starting to phone the boys and talking about things that I wish she wouldn't be thinking about yet. I wasn't allowed to date until I was 16. Leia has keep me up a few nights lately worrying about her. I can't even imagine what it's going to be like when she starts high school next year. I was glad to hear from DL that she has had some similar problems with her pre-teen. We talked for 2 1/2 hours about it and I felt like we could have talked longer about it all. I was happy to know I am not alone and that someone can relate to me. DL and I may not have some things in common but we both seem to be on the same page with our daughters. I feel like this is just the beginning with Leia...I am sure things are only going to get worse before they get better. I'm just glad she will have her black belt by the time she is 16 and can defend herself. I know the hormones that teenage boys have and she will be able to kick some ass if she needs to. Well it's that time of the year coming up....Thanksgiving for our U.S. readers and the holidays are coming up very soon. We have already put up our Christmas tree and I've started buying gifts. I was asked recently by Master Anakin and some other friends to do up a Christmas list of what I want. I've decided to share that list on my blog. If you would like to exchange online Christmas cards with me or through the snail mail, please let me know at shyanne.blog@gmail.com. I always send a Christmas card to those who send me one. :) This is my Christmas list...hopefully I've been nice enough this year to get some naughty gifts. *winks* Aromatherapy - I love the stores like Lush, Saje and Escents. My close friend, Shasta also loves Lush and put some on her Christmas list that she posted yesterday. :) There is nothing better than a Lush Bath Bomb to enjoy or a massage bar. I personally love the dream time the best. It helps me sleep when I am having insomnia. I also love the smell of lavender and any essential oil or bubble bath in lavender. Books or gift cards for Chapters - I would love to read the Ethical Slut. I've heard good things about that book. I also enjoy erotic fiction or biographies. Starbucks gift cards or any treats from there - I LOVE Starbucks and enjoy having my lattes there and love all their different treats. Leather paddle - Check out Shasta's blog for a review on the paddle and where to buy it from. I have always wanted a leather paddle and this one looks awesome! Maybe if you give it to me as a gift, you can even give me a spanking with it?? *smiles* Miami Vice Season 5 - Pretty please Santa? I've been a REALLY good girl all year long and I really need the next season of Miami Vice so I can get my Crockett fix. If you are able to somehow...I'd even love you to send me Don Johnson to give me a spanking?? Sex and the City and the Sopranos DVD's - I don't have any of those favorite series on DVD yet and would love to watch them all again. Little Miss Dangerous thong from Darkside Digital Arts (size large) - It can match my little miss dangerous t-shirt :) Bad Pussy t-shirt from Darkside Digital Arts (size Extra large) - I love the Bad pussy stuff on our online store. This t-shirt looks so cute and I would love it! Master loves you forever Aftercare Bear from Darkside Digital Arts - awww...this looks so cute and I am hoping that Master might buy it for me. :) Leather wrist cuffs from JT's Stockroom - I have always wanted leather cuffs. mmmm...nothing like some bondage fun for a neat christmas gift that you can use all year round :) Strap-on's from JT's stockroom - I would love a strap-on but I would like it more if there was a woman who would like me to use it with her. Maybe for Christmas this year I will finally have some naughty fun with a woman again. That would be a really great Christmas gift! A spanking - A spanking doesn't cost anyone a cent yet it is a great gift to give me for Christmas. There are a few people who I would love to spank me for Christmas. Especially Santa! *winks* An e-card or card in the mail or even a phone call - I love to hear from you and would love a card or just to hear from you this holiday season. :) Tommorow is our HNT so stay tuned! It's a really naughty one taken over our anniversary weekend. If you missed any of the naughty details of our anniversary...check it out HERE! The picture I put up today was taken last Christmas time with my sexy Christmas thigh-hi's. I think it's time to get those out again for some naughty Christmas fun with Master. May the force be with you all!! ~padme amidala

A neat meme

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An anniversary to remember

What a weekend! I can honestly say that this last weekend was one of the most memorable and relaxing weekends I have had in a very long time. I've got lots of details to share about our anniversary weekend and I want to blog about them while they are all fresh in my mind. Today is a good day for blogging as it's dark and rainy and cold outside. yuck! I wish it was still the weekend and I miss Master so much today. It was hard to let such a wonderful weekend end. We had some really special times that I will never forget. On Saturday morning we were told we were getting an overnight for Skywalker which was unexpected. We had no kids for 24 hours and we sat down to try to figure out where to go. We were a bit worried it was too late to make reservations at some of our favorite restaurants. We were both thinking of the same place to head to. I suggested River Rock Casino and Hotel which is where we stayed for my 35th birthday last month. We would have liked to stay in the hotel like last time but it's too close to Christmas and we are watching our budget. We really love the buffet there at Runway 26. It has some of the best selection of gourmet foods and a really nice view. We also really enjoy gambling there. It's a great way to feel like you've gone to Las Vegas without paying all the cost for it. We wanted to also get some Christmas shopping done while we had no kids around. I needed Master's help with chosing some gifts for them. We decided to head to Metrotown in Burnaby to do some shopping as there is so many good stores there. I dressed in my green sweater that Master loves and did my hair and make up and shaved my pussy. Master wore a really nice green sweater too. He looked so handsome and smelled so good with his Axe cologne on that I love. We headed out to Metrotown in the rain. It was a total zoo with Christmas shoppers out in full force. It took us a while to find a parking spot. People looked crazy and we got bumped into quite a few times by people who were not looking where they were going. We went to the Toys R Us there which is really big and has some great gifts for our kids. We went to Chapters and some other stores to find gifts for different people. We stopped by the food fair there for a quick snack and drink as we didn't want to eat too much as we knew we were going to the buffet later. Master bought me an anniversary present which I love!! He bought me Lindsay Buckingham's Under the Skin cd last year before we went to his concert for our 10 year anniversary. This year I got a cd by Michael Buble' called Let it Snow with some amazing Christmas songs on it. We listened to it in the car coming home from the River Rock and I felt so extremely relaxed listening to the music. Michael Buble' is amazing and I love his songs so much. My favorite song by him is called Home and reminds me so much of Master. We headed to the River Rock Casino and Hotel after Metrotown. I was amazed at a stunning sunset that was happening as we pulled up and parked. We walked around outside and took some pictures and did some kissing and making out. Click to enlarge the pictures. I put up one today from the sunset over the marina. The rain had stopped and the sunset was so beautiful and it felt like such a romantic moment. We looked into each other's eyes and we looked up at the hotel room we stayed in for my birthday and talked about how we fucked as we watched planes landing that night and how incredible that was. At that very moment a huge plane flew right over our heads and looked amazing as it landed as the sun was setting. Sooooooo beautiful and perfect! I loved being there with Master again. I truly deeply love him and I will always remember that moment outside watching the plane flying over our heads and landing into the beautiful sunset and him kissing him with passion and how incredibly romantic that was. We went inside the hotel and it was all decorated for Christmas and looked so amazing. There was a Santa and reindeer display there and I loved how much it added to the holiday spirit. We went up to the buffet for dinner and got there right as it was opening. Master asked for a table with a view and we got lucky with a beautiful private table overlooking the marina view and also of the River Rock sign all lit up. It looked soooo beautiful!! We got our food which was amazing! It is a bit expensive for the buffet but worth it. You can eat lobster and prime rib or different salads or foods. The selection is just amazing and we loaded up our plates and enjoyed our dinner and had some really good conversation. The desserts were even more incredible!! I think I ate more cheesecake and chocolate than I had in a long time. lol. mmmmm...just thinking about it makes me want to go back and eat more! We headed out to the hotel and saw a statue of the Blues Brothers which was really neat. I put up a picture of it today. The Blues Brothers show is playing at the show theatre. We then headed over to the casino. Master had me on a budget and gave me my money for the quarter slots and sat me down the slots while he went up to play video poker. We didn't win anything but that was ok. It was fun to play on the slots for a while and we didn't feel ready to leave so we headed over the bar there called Rendezvous which we love. We watched people gambling as we enjoyed our drinks. Master had to drink coke as he was driving but I enjoyed some rye and coke. I love the casino environment. It was so neat to linger over a drink and just have time to people watch and enjoy good conversation. We headed home listening to the new cd and feeling excited about what was to come. We were both excited about playing. Master had cleaned up the livingroom so it was nice and clean and toys were laid out ready for us. We came home and lit some candles and put on our fireplace and a porno from shaw on demand. I went upstairs to get ready for play. I dressed up in my prep schoolgirl skirt and little miss dangerous t-shirt and pink thong and also cute thigh-hi's and schoolgirl shoes. I put my hair up in pony tails and got ready to come downstairs to Master who was waiting for me with all the toys laid out. I was so nervous and yet extremely excited! I knew there was going to be a spanking coming and I had no idea what he had planned for me. He ordered me down to our basement and told me that he had plans to paddle me over the school desk like a naughty schoolgirl. He grabbed the Anakin's paddle and went headed downstairs. It was freezing down there!! My nipples got so erect right away as I was not wearing a bra and the basement was so cold! He had the school desk out waiting for me to bend over it. I complained a bit about how cold it was to bend over the desk but he didn't care about that. I was told to sit on the desk with the skirt up so my ass could feel how cold it was. He lectured me about how naughty girls get paddled for being so naughty and I could see his hard on through the boxers he was wearing. He told me I looked "dangerous" in my cute outfit and how much he was going to enjoy fucking me after giving my ass lots of attention. I was told to stand up and then lift my t-shirt and put my nipples down to the desk while I bent over for the paddling. He started off slowly with his Anakin's paddle before gradually warming up my bottom with the paddling. The sounds of the paddle echoed through our basement. I put up a picture of the paddling today for you. We plan to put up another photo from the basement for our HNT picture later this week so stay tuned for that. :) He told me it was time to go upstairs and gave me a few smacks on my ass as I headed upstairs for more play. I was put on my leash and told to sit on the floor while we watched the porno and sipped on our drinks. There was a really good threesome scene with two girls and a guy on there. I got Master's cock out of his boxers and started sucking while he watched it. He told me to remove my t-shirt and he put clothespins on my nipples and then I was told to bend over the couch for some more spanking time. He used his belt, paddle, flogger, homemade whip and razor strop on my ass many times throughout the hour while playing with my pussy and nipples. He told me he wouldn't stop til my ass was bleeding. My skirt was lifted and my thong didn't give any protection against the impliments he used over and over again. I floated in a deep subspace taking the pain for him. He would stop and feel my wet pussy at times and stimulate me and then tell me that I was so naughty and wet and how I was going to be punished for getting his cock so hard and him all worked up. He felt my ass had enough attention when he finally drew blood in a few places. My ass was soooo sore and red and bruised by the time he was done. He ordered me down to the comforter laying out by the fireplace. He told me how he was going to fuck me up my pussy and then he was going to take my ass. We havn't done anal for a while and that made me a bit nervous. I love anal but I was not prepared. Usually I wear my butt plug for a while to get my ass ready but I hadn't done that and was hoping my ass would be ok with being fucked. He took off my thong roughly and bent me over doggy style to fuck me in the pussy and then ass. The anal sex was intense. Master told me yesterday he heard the most primal sounds coming from me while fucking my ass hard. The porno was going in the background and I could hear the woman screaming out in orgasm and the anal pushed me to the point I could feel myself cumming. Master told me to cum for him and I screamed so loud that the orgasm shook my whole body. Anal sex seems to bring on the most intense orgasms for me. He told me after fucking my ass that he wasn't satisfied with me only cumming once. He knows I am a slut who can cum a lot and he wanted more orgasms from me. He told me to clean myself up and come back naked to him. He told me the Hiatchi was waiting for me. I was given two more orgasms with the Hiatchi one right after the other. They were so extremely intense that I didn't think I could make it back up to our bedroom. My head was swirling with subspace and hormones and my legs felt weak. He helped me up and sent me upstairs with a big slap on my ass. He told me he would clean up the livingroom and to wait for him. We snuggled together and had a snack before I drifted off to the most relaxing sleep I had in a long time. I was naked and in his arms and felt so safe and submissive. After all the insomnia lately, the sleep felt so good and needed. I woke up Sunday and took a nice hot shower with Master before we fucked again for a morning quickie before Skywalker came home. I made him a big breakfast and we spent a nice quiet morning together. Yesterday we had some family time with putting up our Christmas tree and also watching the movie, Blades of Glory with the kids. It was a really funny movie and we all enjoyed it. Our force felt strong and I felt so deeply connected to Master. We snuggled together a lot and spent lots of really good time together. I miss him today so much and am thinking about him lots. It was a really special anniversary weekend and I am feeling so lucky to have such a wonderful and amazing husband and Master. I hope he knows that I am thinking about him a lot today.... May the force be with you all!! ~padme amidala

The Top 500 Blogs

News release: Journey to the Darkside To Be Included In Top 500 Blogs Back in the day, if you didn't know HTML, or code, you couldn't publish content on the web. Well, nowadays with tools such as Wordpress, and services like Blogspot, and Xanga, anyone.. yes anyone can tell the whole world what is on their mind through blogging. But, there really isn't a robust way to search for the best blogs on any specific topic. Sure, there's Technorati, but what else? Besides, much of the world wide web is full of splogs, spam, and made-for-adsense blogs. And how many times have you read the same exact post over and over in different blogs? That is why a project, listing the top blogs by general categories would prove useful. The book, titled "The Top 500 Blogs" is being written by online dating blogger Vicky Zhou. From topics ranging from dating to technology, lifestyle, sports, music, health and fashion, the books aims to be a comprehensive list of the top 500 blogs on the world wide web. The Top 500 Blogs will be out in bookstores in Q4 of 2008. Journey to the Darkside will be included in the category of "Sex & Eroticism", so keep an eye out for that! P.S. Anakin and padme had an amazing anniversary weekend. padme will be posting the naughty details shortly, so check back soon. May the Force be with you. Anakin

Celebrating 11 years together tonight

I want to give a very big thank you to all the people who commented on my last blog post. I re-read the comments over many times and some of them touched me so much that I got emotional over them. It was a huge relief to hear from others who understand and who know what it feels like to be depressed. I have been feeling very alone and in a very dark place lately. I got a few e-mails also and they really meant so much to me. Thank you for the support and being there during this difficult time! I was so worried about publishing that post and that I sounded too whiney and I was worried how people would react to it. It was very difficult to open up about my childhood especially. It is something that is so hard to talk about. I try to push some of those memories out of my mind but they are burned into my memory and I struggle with some of my very intense dark fantasies. I struggle with the fact that I have a belt fetish also and the belt was my Dad's favorite impliment to spank me with growing up. I wasn't on the computer much yesterday. I had a very quiet day. I was so tired from a severe lack of sleep lately with my insomnia. We had a very quiet night. We watched Mr. Brooks with Kevin Costner. That was a really good movie! It surprised me with all the twists and turns and the ending shocked me a lot. It was a very different side to Kevin Costner. I am not too fond of him but I did enjoy him in that movie. He played a very dark character with a darkside. I recommend the movie a lot. I would like to watch it again sometime as there was so many different things happening in it. We found out some really good news this morning. Master Anakin's parent's are taking Skywalker for us overnight tonight!! We havn't had much sitting lately and they are taking him overnight so we can celebrate our anniversary tonight. Leia is at her Dad's til tommorow. So we have no kids for a whole 24 hours! I was not expecting this at all. We were told they would watch him while we went out for dinner but I didn't think we'd get an overnight. So this is a total bonus for us! Things have been strained lately with Master and I and we desperately need some alone time. We havn't fucked since last Friday night. We havn't played either since then. Master was too tired to play last night. I really miss getting spanked. I miss getting fucked. I miss Master. I miss playing with Darth Vader. With all the stress lately I am craving a good beating. I am excited about tonight and can't wait to go out for dinner and have a evening free to be together and play together. We are still not sure yet what we are going to do tonight with going out for dinner or where we will go. The overnight was so unexpected that we are not sure what we are going to do with all that time together tonight. I will be happy just to be with Master and have playtime with him at some point. I need this sooooooooo bad!!! I don't remember the last time we went out for a nice dinner together with no kids. I think it was on my birthday last month. We are celebrating 11 years together tonight. Our anniversary is on the 23rd but we are going to celebrate it tonight. It's hard to believe it's been 11 years since that day that I took a chance and told Master Anakin that I was in love with him. So much has happened and it feels like we have been to hell and back. It has not been an easy journey for us. There were times that I wondered if we would make it through. The last few weeks even have been rough for us. I can't wait to go out tonight and get our force back. I miss him soooo much!! We both promised that we would leave our stress aside for one night and celebrate tonight. It feels good to have something to look forward to tonight. I've got to shave my pussy and get ready for tonight soon. I plan to leave the toys out for when we get back and are ready to play. I am sure I will be blogging about all the naughty details of tonight. :) I put up a new poll on our sidebar. We are asking you "what would you like Santa to bring you this year" and we would love for you to vote and let us know through comment or e-mail what is on your christmas list this year. Skywalker and Leia both did up their Christmas lists this week and it's full of electronics and different things they want. I better get my Christmas list started soon. I know of some naughty things that I am hoping for from Santa. :) Be sure to check out Darkside Digital Arts for any Christmas ideas for your shopping. Time to get ready for our date and celebration tonight. It feels so wonderful to have something to look forward to and be excited about something for the first time in weeks. I hope everyone is having a very good weekend! May the force be with you all!! ~padme amidala

Having insomnia and feeling depressed

I am having insomnia tonight and I can't sleep. I tossed and turned and couldn't sleep. I am hoping by writing out some feelings tonight that it might help me sleep and maybe sort a few things out. My last blog post which was our HNT picture I had written a post and wrote out a bunch of feelings but decided to re-write it after calming down a bit. I admit I was worried I would sound whiney to people and complaining too much about my problems lately. So I edited the post and published it. I am also worried even tonight that this blog is being too negative lately and we havn't had enough fun or sexy posts. I know many blogs which do keep the negativity in their lives out of their blogs. Lately I havn't been writing too many happy and wonderful positive posts. I noticed a dip recently in our stats so perhaps it's cost us some readers. I know if we talked about spanking 100% of the time that perhaps more people would read us but I am not sure I would still be blogging. I know I wanted to give up this blog when I felt pressured to constantly write sexy posts. I was even told by someone who was once my friend that he felt our blog would be "bigger" if we wrote more about spanking and talked less about our lives. Perhaps that is true but I like to keep Journey to the Darkside real and honest and I'd like people to know the real people behind this blog. This blog was created at first to find friends who understood and I hope that others will understand that underneath Anakin and padme...there are two real people who have very real lives and we go through rough times as much as good times and naughty times. We tried at one point to make Journey to the Darkside just a spanking blog. I got bored with writing about only spanking all the time. I wanted to give up blogging. There is only so much you can talk about spanking before it gets too repetitive. I even tried to have a seperate blog (padme's devotions) where I talked about emotional issues. I found it too hard to keep up two blogs. I wanted to be able to be able to talk about our life as much as our spanking desires or sex fantasies in this blog. We are spankos and we enjoy that a lot but I didn't want this blog to be about spanking crosswords or spanking questions or many of the other things other spanking blogs have done. Sure we share our spanking pictures and adventures but Journey to the Darkside is more than that. I wanted this blog to be about our life...the good, the bad and the ugly. For everyone to get to know the real people behind this blog. We love Star wars, spanking, sex, playing with others, and lots of other sexy things...but we also struggle and we also have rough times and we also have been on this journey since 1997 and we've gone through so many things that I have not shared with this blog. I almost wish I had been blogging during some of our early years of D/s. I resisted it so much and we fought a lot and it was not easy at all. I still struggle with my spanking desires. I still struggle with being a slave. This journey has not been an easy one. I have struggled on this journey since starting D/s and since discovering my spanking desires. I come from a very dysfunctional home and I am a very emotional person. I write from my heart. I don't want to try to pretend that things are all wonderful when to be honest...they havn't been. Things have been difficult...my relationship with Master Anakin has been strained...I am a on edge most of the time and I have been struggling a lot with some serious depression lately. It's been a really tough month and it's been hard to be sexy and write positive posts when it feels like things are crumbling all around me. I am trying to stay positive but when I am having a good day (like today) something will happen and it will bring everything crashing down on me. It seems like we havn't been able to have a break from the stress. Tonight we had a family night all planned out. I was going to cook a pasta dinner for the family and we planned to watch a family movie with our children. But then all hell broke loose...there was a problem going on with Leia and her attitude and we had to have a serious sit down talk with her. She is entering the teenage years and she's been a bit of a handful lately. Full of attitude and hormones and difficult to deal with. I even had to phone my ex husband tonight to get him to help us with what is going on. I also found out some other news about my Dad. I've wondered tonight...when will it stop? When will he stop hurting me and those that I love. I am carrying around a lot of anger towards him right now. I know it's not healthy but I can't help how I feel. I told Master Anakin tonight that I wished I had a normal childhood...I wish I had a normal dad. I can't help but wonder how differently I would have turned out if I had a Dad who didn't abuse me growing up and abuse his family. I was telling Leia tonight what it was like to grow up in an abusive home. I know she thinks she has it rough sometimes but she has a wonderful life with two dads who love her and are there for her. My Dad liked to use his belt on me a lot and he loved to put me down and I watched him give my mom black eyes and push her around a lot. I watched him abuse my siblings and I wondered everyday if he was in an ok mood so he wouldn't pick on one of us or hurt us. Leia looked shocked tonight when I shared a few stories with her from my childhood. I wanted her to understand that I was raised differently. She is lucky. She has been given a wonderful life and she doesn't have to live in fear of her Dad like I was of mine growing up. I even started to wonder tonight if I am am normal for my spanko desires. Is something wrong with me for liking to be spanked with a belt? That was my Dad's favorite impliment that he used on me and my siblings. We got the belt when we were children and it wasn't an easy time of it either. I have memories of having to bare my bottom and how hard my Dad would beat me with his belt. Is it normal now that I like to have that done to me from my husband? How differently would I have been if I had a Dad who loved me and supported me and was there for me growing up and as an adult? All I have ever wanted is to be loved by him. It is so simple yet for him...it is something he can't seem to do. He's bitter and angry inside and he wants to take it out on those around him. I wonder if he passed away today..what would I feel? Would I feel relieved? Would I feel sad? Would I regret that we were never close? I long so much for that "Daddy" who would have given me the love growing up and been there and that I didn't live in fear of growing up. Did it make him feel good to abuse us and to hurt us and to see us suffer? Why was he like that? I know he was abused as a child but does that make it ok for him doing it to us? I have raised my children so differently. I tell them I love them everyday and I have never hit them with a belt or told them they were losers or put them down. I can't imagine treating them the way I was treated growing up. Why? Why did he do that to me? Why did he do that to his family? I have to come to terms with the fact that I never really had a dad and I never will. We will never be close...and he will continue to try to hurt me if I let him. I hate to walk away but I know in my heart that things won't change and he will continue to try to hurt those I love and me. I hope that others reading might understand where I am coming from with this. It has been a real struggle for me since starting D/s and also with enjoying being spanked. I sometimes fear that it is because of my childhood and things that happened that I am the way I am. I started cutting myself at 13 to ease the emotional pain of what was going on inside our home. I get stressed now and I desire pain to make it better. I want a beating and to have a spanking and to have an escape for a while. Am I trying to re-create my childhood? Is it wrong for me to be a masochist? Is it wrong for me to want Master Anakin to use his belt on me the way my Dad did? I am struggling...I've struggled since 1997 with this and I struggle even now with some of those questions. I wish I could write sexy posts right now. I wish sexy stuff was happening so I could write about them. I havn't had sex since last Friday when we played and we had our overnight. There hasn't been any sexy webcam nights or fun with friends lately either. The poly seems to have just stopped...no plans to get together with Max. I have to wonder if he's a bit afraid to get together with me after what happened last month with my pregnancy scare. I've been thinking a lot about nikki lately even. I miss being with a woman. I miss that connection with another woman. I miss having a relationship with another woman. I wonder if I will ever have that again. I am also very lonely lately. DL called tonight and asked me out for coffee Tuesday and I jumped at the chance. I also chatted with talia tonight on msn about hopefully getting together with her sometime. I miss having friends that I can get together with. I get stuck inside with the rainy weather and I feel lonely and depressed. Chatting with friends is great but it's not the same as being able to get together with someone and have coffee with them or see them face to face. Sometimes I even miss my old friend, S. We had some neat trips out to Wal mart and good talks at McDonalds. I wish I could blame PMS but it's too early for that. I know that I am depressed and overwhelmed with life lately. Grandma A is dying and it's been hard to wait for the phone to ring with news. It feels like life is a bit up in the air with that. We have plans for Saturday to go out for our 11 year anniversary but if something happens with Grandma A, they will have to be put on hold. It's hard to plan anything, even Christmas. I tried to talk to Master Anakin's family about christmas but they don't want to deal with it. It's a difficult situation for everyone and I am not sure when everyone will have closure. November is typically a bad month for me also. I get SAD (seasonal affective disorder) and with daylight savings time making the days shorter that means less light for me. Also it's been raining a lot this month and we've even had some stormy weather too. I had to walk down to the school in pouring rain today. Major yuck!! It does affect me a lot when I don't get proper light. I was diagnosed by my Doctor and I have even gone to tanning booths to try to treat this disorder. I have been considering going on St. John's wort recently as it did help me through a difficult time many years ago. I really hope that I won't have to go back on antidepressants again. I was on them years ago but it affected my sex drive too much and even my ability to have orgasms. I didn't like being on them. I should probably see my Doctor although I am putting it off. I was supposed to go in for tests also but again..I've been putting it off. It's almost midnight but I am wide awake. I can't sleep these days. I don't eat much either. I am stressed to the max and wishing so much that I could have some fun...be able to smile again and to be naughty again. I miss being able to write sexy posts. I know I havn't been a good friend lately with being so down all the time. I havn't been a good slave lately to Master Anakin. I havn't been good with responding to comments or e-mails. I just feel shitty about feeling so shitty. That is the honest truth. I hope people will read this and be able to understand how I am feeling. My diet has gone out the window and I havn't posted on our diet blog in a while. I havn't stepped on the scale in a while. If it weren't for the walks lately, I don't think I would be exercising much. I know this is a sign of depression. I've had it in the past and it is something I have struggled with for years. I've had councelling and taken medication and done all kinds of things to try to make it better. My force isn't very strong and I feel fragile and not very strong. I am afraid to reach out for help whether that is to my friends or my doctor or even Master. I am afraid to admit I need help. I am depressed and I am suffering inside and I am really longing to be truly happy again. To be able to say that my force is strong again. I hope the people reading this will understand how hard it was to post this. To open myself and talk about things that I kept secret for years. The abuse in my childhood was a big secret. We were not allowed to talk about it growing up. I still havn't shared stories of what happened with those people closest to me. It's too painful to talk about. I still have emotional scars and probably always will. It is now 1:30 am and I am still up and adding more onto this post...watching the rain tonight and doing a lot of thinking. I've struggled so much with this post. I admit I am wondering if anyone will even comment on it. Writing this post was probably the most difficult one I have written in the last two years of blogging. It is probably also the most honest post ever. I have said things that are hard to talk about from my past. I only hope that someone somewhere will read this and be able to understand. To understand what it is like for a daughter to long for a Dad that is not there. To have been abused as a child and afraid of a Dad growing up. To wonder if she is "normal" for her spanking desires and wanting to be a slave. To struggle inside with depression and loneliness and to long to be loved... May the force be with you all!! ~padme amidala

Happy HNT - Milkhouse tit flash

Happy HNT! Master Anakin had planned to do the HNT but he has plans tonight and asked me to put it up. I admit I really wasn't feeling in the mood to write today. I've got a lot of different emotions spinning around today due to all the stress lately which has been going on. Today I found out some really upsetting news which has sent me into a downward spiral. My sister wrote an e-mail saying that she plans to elope instead of doing the family wedding. My Dad fucked it up for everyone. Everyone loses out because my Dad has to be an asshole. I will not get to see my little sister walk down the aisle or be there for her. I was very upset today as I felt like my sister was shutting me out. I am deeply relieved tonight after a really good phone call with her tonight. She explained why she is eloping and although I am sad about it, I do understand where she is coming from. I have offered to have some type of celebration for her when she elopes so I can still be a part of it somehow. I am sad she will not have the big traditional wedding that she dreamed of but I hope I can still make it special for her somehow. Today was a really rough day for me and I felt very emotional over this situation with my sister. We are still dealing with the situation also with Master Anakin's grandma. I really hope things will get better. I would seriously love some escape and play right now. I really miss being naughty and having some fun. Master Anakin and I's 11 year anniversary is coming up next week and I am really hoping to make it special somehow and make some time for us even if we don't get sitting. We really need that right now. Our force hasn't felt very strong lately. I had a good talk with my close friend, Shasta today on the phone. We talked for a very long time. I get so lonely sometimes during the day and our phone calls really cheer me up so much. I'd like to thank her for sending me some more loose tea. I tried the mint chocolate black tea today and it helped to calm me down and was so delicious. She's been a really amazing friend to me through the rough times lately and I really love our phone calls. Chatting with someone can be really nice but sometimes you just need to hear someone's voice. I sent her a little something in the mail too and was so happy to hear that she got it today on the same day I received her neat gift with the tea. I am so thankful for our friendship. I hope everyone was able to check out our online store, Darkside Digital Arts for gift ideas for Christmas. Master Anakin wrote a post yesterday about a new product and some gift ideas. I am starting to make my Christmas list now and starting to think about gifts. I even started my Christmas shopping this week. We found an old picture in our archives to put up for HNT this week. I think it's a really different type of flash picture that we have done here at Journey to the Darkside. We were out exploring during a drive one afternoon while we had some sitting during the summer. We came across a heritage park which had some neat stuff like a old milkhouse and old barn from the 1900's. Master wanted me to flash my tits in the milkhouse and made some funny jokes about my tits. I breastfed both of my children and used to have milk in my tits and he thought it was funny I was flashing in a milkhouse. Someone could have easily stumbled across me flashing my tits in that public place so it was very exciting. I'm a naughty little exhibitionist. I guess that is why Master calls me little miss dangerous. :) Here are Master Anakin's thoughts on it "Hello and Happy HNT again, everyone. It's Half-Nekkid Thursday again.This week we've looked back into our photo archives to the summer and found a really fun flash photo. This was taken the same day as the Fraser Flash and nearby. It seems poor padme just couldn't keep her shirt down that day (not that she usually can anyway).The first photo is of padme flashing her tits inside this little old building called the Milkhouse. It was a bright, sunny day and wewandered around this historic farm with farming implements (oh I love that word), and old barn, and this milkhouse. I photoshopped in a milk bottle to suit the theme and cover padme's face for privacy." "In the third photo, you can see the outside of the Milkhouse, a historic little building we visited on a drive in the country last summer. It was used to store milk. Well, having a dirty mind, just like padme, milk made me think of, well, tits. Specifically, padme's,and how good they would look flashed inside the little old milkhouse.padme had wandered ahead as I took this photo, but I called her back with a whistle and told her to get inside the building. After a quick look around for onlookers, none were close enough to see padme inside the milkhouse. So I told her to do it and she lifted her blouse and that's how we got the first photo." "Needless to say, things got very heated with some hurried, topless making out inside the milkhouse. I wanted to take her inside the barn for a proper spanking but there were just too many curious people that day." "The second photo shows the little sign posted on the building explaining its history.I hope you enjoy this weeks HNT." Please leave us a comment on the HNT picture. We'd love to hear from you through a comment or e-mail. We always appreciate the feedback. Happy hump day! May the force be with you all!! ~padme amidala Technorati Tags: HNT, public flash, public nudity, tits, exhibitionist, milkhouse

Christmas is coming! Unique shopping ideas

As The Grinch says about Christmas, "It’s practically here!" Well, not quite, but it IS a great time to consider sending off orders for any Internet items on your shopping list. I wanted to share with you some great gifting ideas from Darkside Digital Arts, the kinky and unique clothing shop of Journey to the Darkside. There's still plenty of time to order before Santa with his big black belt makes his way down the chimney on Christmas Eve. So without further adieu, some ideas at our little shop for you and those you care for. Click on the designs to see them in greater detail in our store. This is our very latest design, added yesterday. For the Pro spanker or the spanko in your life, or maybe it describes you to a tee. We've got a great collection of adult shirts here for whatever your kink is; spanking and bdsm, we've got you covered. For the gamers in your life, this is one of our most popular gamer designs; considering how many people love the video game Halo 3, it's no real surprise. Weather it's the Xbox 360 or the Wii, check all our gamer designs here. We love Star Wars; what can we say. We love this quote from Darth Vader and many others seem to too. A few other sexy and cool Star Wars quotes are here. Bah. Humbug, and all that. This Christmas t-shirt design says it all about how some people feel about the Christmas season and the holiday itself. Santa says what's REALLY on his mind. More great and surprising Christmas designs here. The USSR is gone, but the logo lives on in this worn, grunge looking red Russian star logo. This retro nostalgia Soviet Union C.C.C.P. shirt is just the thing for you, comrade. It's one of our most popular designs. We've got more eclectic retro clothing designs here, including Space Invaders and a quote from the Son of Sam. These are a few of many designs available at our store. Thanks so much for taking a look. Enjoy. May the Force be with you all! ~Anakin

A great disturbance in the force

Today has been a truly horrible day for me. Master Anakin had planned to blog tonight but he wasn't in the mood so I decided to go ahead and write out a few of my feelings going on inside of me right now. I woke up this morning to a tearful phone call from my sister. She is getting married in a few months and she is upset because my Dad is playing games and it is uncertain whether he is coming to her wedding. He did not come to my wedding to Master Anakin and played a lot of games with me during the planning of our wedding so I know exactly how my sister is feeling about this. What should be a happy time is being clouded over with family drama...all thanks to my Dad who can't help but be an asshole to those in his family. I sometimes wonder if he will ever truly change. I found myself extremely upset over what is happening with this situation. I had to hold back from phoning him up and telling him how I feel about what he is doing. It brought back memories today of what it felt like to show up for my wedding and to expect my Dad would walk me down the aisle but instead notice he was not there. Master Anakin had to walk me down the aisle instead. After all the abuse through my childhood and what he put me through, he couldn't be there for the most important day of my life. Now he is putting my sister through the same thing and it's very difficult to be watching this happen. Master and I had a very strong force this weekend but today seemed different with us. We are both stressed out right now. His grandma is still holding on and the nerves are raw in his family right now with waiting for the phone to ring. I really hate to see him going through this right now and I hate that I felt like he was pushing me away today. I felt so extremely disconnected to Master today. I feel disconnected lately from many people in my life. It's left me feeling very fragile. On top of it all...I've come down with a very nasty head cold and flu. I've felt sick for hours and have had a fever and constantly blowing my nose. Master is out right now getting me some medication so I can hopefully sleep tonight. I am so tired and worn out from it all. I spent a few hours on the couch curled up in my comforter watching Nicolas Cage in the movie Next. It was a pretty interesting movie. It made me wonder what it would be like to be able to see into the future. I'm not sure how much I will be online in the next few days. I'm not feeling very well and it's been a really stressful time. I am hoping that the force will be strong again soon.... May the force be with you all!! ~padme amidala

Friday night paddling

Thank you to everyone who voted in our latest poll. We had asked you what your favorite spanking picture was from six different ones we put up. 36% of you liked the over the knee picture the best. Everyone always loves an erotic OTK picture. :) 20% of you voted for the bottom and belt which came in second. That picture was the winner from a previous poll for favorite HNT picture from last year. It is one of my own personal favorites. :) As promised here are two new spanking pictures for you that were both taken on Friday night. We had an overnight and we got to play. I dressed up as a naughty schoolgirl with my butterfly thong and white cute thigh-hi's and tight white top that showed off my tits nicely. Master got a hard on when he saw me all dressed up for him. I was paddled hard with the Anakin's paddle as you can see in the action shot of the paddle hitting my ass making it nicely red and sore. I was also given a few hard ones with the cane and his belt. We had some play in our basement. The other picture is me heading to the bad girl corner in our bedroom. The butterfly thong had been ripped off and my red paddled ass was put in the corner for ten minutes. I was rubbing my bottom trying to make it feel better. Darth Vader made it soooooo sore! He really is a mean old man. ;) My schoolgirl skirt was lifted and I was fucked hard after my corner time. I was made to cum with the Hiatchi three times for him before we fell asleep as we cuddled together. It was a perfect night of play for us and we both reconnected and got our force strong again. We were not able to play last night like we had wanted to. We were both too tired. Tonight we are hoping to have more playtime. Master is off tommorow for Remembrance day. I am really glad he is home tommorow. We are hoping to work on some household projects and Master wants to work on our online store, Darkside Digital Arts. Stay tuned for some new products soon for the store. :) I hope everyone is having a spanking good weekend! May the force be with you all!! ~padme amidala

Some wonderful news!

I got some wonderful news tonight and I wanted to share it with our blog. I'm smiling a lot tonight and celebrating some wonderful news. My sister got engaged recently and they set the date this weekend for next year. She phoned me to ask me a very important question. She wants me to be her maid of honor! I was so surprised and shed some very happy tears after telling her I would be honored to stand up for her at her wedding. I'm so extremely happy for her tonight. She sounded so happy on the phone and excited. I was surprised she asked me. I had my friend, S as my maid of honor at my wedding with Master Anakin. My sister was a bridesmaid at my wedding. I thought she would ask one of her close friends instead. So it really surprised me and I am so happy tonight. She is marrying a really terrific guy and I support this marriage 100%. She's been through a lot and she deserves some happiness in her life. There is so much to think about now! She wants help with planning her wedding and now we have to book a trip as it will be out of town. I also need to find a nice dress to wear. She is letting me pick out my own and I want to make sure I look nice for it. I've never been a part of a wedding before. This is going to be a really neat experience for me. :) It's been a really nice long weekend so far. We got an overnight last night and had a really wonderful night together. I will blog about the details of last night sometime soon. We had some really amazing play and I feel so deeply connected to Master right now. We had a day out today after taking the Albion Ferry over to Maple Ridge. We went to Golden Ears provincial park and a beautiful lake there. It was so relaxing and nice to get away. Skywalker and I got treated to Pizza Hut for dinner and made a stop by the liquor store for a bottle of wine for tonight. Then we came home to the good news from my sister. I was really glad to get some good family news tonight. I am really glad I've got something so wonderful to look forward to and that I get to be by my little sister's side as she marries the man she loves. I am so deeply happy for her tonight. The force feels strong with her. There is no news about Grandma A. She is still holding on. It's been a difficult week for the family waiting for the phone to ring and for the bad news. I hope she is able to rest in peace soon. Master Anakin and I appreciate the supportive e-mails and comments about his Grandma. We will keep everyone updated. Master and I plan to play again tonight after our son is in bed. I am craving some play with Darth Vader tonight. I can't wait to get some more pain from Master. It seems like the more pain I get...the more I crave. Please be sure to vote in our new poll in the last blog post. We would love to hear from you on which spanking picture you liked the most from the six we put up. I hope everyone is having a good weekend! May the force be with you all!! ~padme amidala

Spanking picture new poll

TGIF! I am so glad it's Friday and also the start to the long weekend. Master is off on Monday for Remembrance day. My kids are off today as well as Monday. It's been a very long week and there is still no news about Grandma A. It's hard to wait for the phone to ring for news. We did find out that we are going to have an overnight tommorow night if there is no news about Grandma A. I am trying to not get too excited about it yet in case it doesn't happen. I am crossing my fingers we get some time together and an overnight. We might celebrate our 11 year anniversary early tommorow if we get the overnight. Our anniversary is in two weeks but we are worried about what is going to happen with Grandma A. We may not get sitting for a while and we wanted to go out for dinner. We'd also like some play time. I miss playing with Darth Vader. :) It's hard to believe it's been 11 years since I got together with Master Anakin. I've known him for 17 years. That is a very long time to know someone and be their best friend. I can't imagine my life without my Anakin...my soulmate and Master. He is my strong force and I love him more than anything. Thank you to everyone who voted in our poll about how long you've been reading our blog. 38% of you said you've been reading it the last year. 34% said this was your first time here. 11% have been reading us from the beginning. We are glad you are joining us on our Journey to the Darkside. It's been a truly amazing journey the last two years. We've got a new poll up on the side bar today. Please vote! We are curious to know what is your favorite spanking picture. I put up six different types of spanking pictures that have been taken in the last two years. Some of them were used for different HNT pictures. These are some of my personal favorites. I know it's going to be hard to chose just one. Please leave us a comment and let us know which one you voted for and why. We really enjoy feedback for our photos and we hope to take many more spanking pictures in the future. If we get enough votes...we just might put up a spanking picture we havn't posted before for you. :) Picture #1 - Over the knee naughty girl spanking picture Picture #2 - Hearts and paddle picture Picture #3 - Paddled bottom picture Picture #4 - Bad girl in the corner picture Picture #5 - Classroom Paddling picture Picture #6 - Bottom and Belt picture I hope everyone has a good weekend and Lest we forget November 11th for Remembrance day. May the force be with you all!! ~padme amidala

Vote for us and a meme

We submitted Journey to the Darkside to Top sexy blogs.com. It's a neat site that has many different blogs from all over the world. We decided to submit our blog and we hope you will vote for us! :) So far we've got 67 votes. :) Thank you to everyone who has voted for us! I've seen this meme around and wanted to give it a try. :) 4 THINGS YOU MAY NOT KNOW ABOUT ME MEME: Four jobs I have had in my life: 1. Secretary 2. Nanny 3. Selling shoes 4. Selling avon (this was my own business I had for 2 1/2 years and I did very well at it) Four movies I have seen more than once: 1. Star Wars 2. Revenge of the Sith 3. Wild Things 4. 9 1/2 weeks Four places I have lived: 1. My parents house growing up 2. A rental for a beautiful house with a huge yard 3. A two bedroom apartment 4. The townhouse we live in now Four Shows that I watch (not necessarily regularly) 1. Young and the Restless 2. Miami Vice - old episodes 3. The Global News Hour every morning 4. Sex and the City Four places I have been: 1. Las Vegas (5 times) 2. Hawaii 3. Los Angeles 4. San Francisco Four People who e-mail me (regularly): 1. my sister 2. Master Anakin (from his work during the week) 3. Daily OM Horoscope 4. Rogers Video Four of my favorite foods: 1. Chicken 2. Salmon 3. Pasta 4. M&M's (does that count as food? lol) Four places I would rather be right now. 1. The beach 2. Visiting my close friend Shasta Gibson 3. In bed cuddling with Master Anakin and watching tv 4. In a hot bath with a glass of merlot Friends I think will respond I am not sure as so many have done the meme. Hopefully a few friends will try the meme who havn't done it yet. :) Four things I am looking forward to this year 1. Master Anakin and I's 11 year anniversary on the 23rd of Nov. 2. The first snowfall in Vancouver 3. Christmas concert at school next month. Leia is going to be acting in it and she's so excited about it. :) 4. New year's eve Happy times 1. The day I married Master Anakin and signed the TPE contract 2. The day Master Anakin proposed to me in Las Vegas by the Mirage Hotel's waterfall 3. The days that both of my children were born 4. Family vacations with Master Anakin and our children May the force be with you all!! ~padme amidala

Happy HNT - Naughty french maid waiting for a paddling

Happy HNT! We had planned to skip this week for HNT but Master Anakin surprised me by doing an HNT picture early this morning. We had both wanted to put this picture up that was taken on Halloween. We both think it's a very sexy one. Click to enlarge photo. I was dressed up in my naughty French maid outfit wearing my pink wig and skull thigh-hi's. I was all dressed up for Halloween. I was sitting on the stairs holding the Anakin's paddle to give to Master for my paddling. That Anakin's paddle has been used on my ass so many times. There is nothing better than a good paddling with the Anakin's paddle and then some fucking and play. mmmm....it's the perfect way to spend Halloween or any other day with Master. We hope you enjoy the HNT picture this week and we would love to hear from you. Please leave us a comment or send us an e-mail. We really enjoy hearing feedback on our pictures and hearing from everyone. :) No news on Grandma A yet. We took Skywalker and Leia to see her in the hospital yesterday so they could say goodbye and spend some time with her. It was important for Leia especially to have some closure and be able to say what she needed to her Great Grandma. Skywalker doesn't really understand as well as he is only six years old. We are now waiting for news. It is uncertain how much longer she has but I hope she will be able to rest in peace soon. Thank you for all the comments and e-mails of support during the last few days. It's been very difficult for our kids and especially on Master Anakin. We appreciate it all very much. This morning I got a nice surprise. Master Anakin was home for a few hours extra as he was driving his Mom into the hospital to see his Grandma. The kids went to school and we practically jumped each other. We couldn't wait to get upstairs and have a little naughty fun and some stress release. I got a really intense hand spanking and orgasm and then fucked very hard doggy style. I was told not to clean up afterwards until he had driven away. I watched him drive away to work with cum running down my legs and a big smile and a nicely sore marked ass. A perfect way to start the morning. :) I had a really nice long talk on the phone with Shasta today. It was so wonderful to spend the day talking with her. I love our phone conversations so much. I am so lucky to have such a special friendship with Shasta. I am able to share things with her that no one else knows about and I feel like she understands me better than most people. There is a side of myself that I keep hidden but I am able to really open myself up with Shasta and I am so grateful for that. I am so glad that we found each other through our blogs. She is truly my ray of sunshine on a rainy day. Today was so much better because of our phone call. :) Happy hump day and happy HNT! May the force be with you all!! ~padme amidala Technorati Tags: HNT, french maid, erotic, spanking, spanko, doggy style

Don't blink

I wanted to write today to get some feelings out and share a song that I heard on the tv this morning. The video came on while I was doing some reflecting about life and death. Thinking about Grandma A and how she is in a hospital bed dying and ready to pass on. Thinking about Master Anakin and how I wish I could make him feel better. Thinking about my grandparents and how they passed away ten years ago but that it seems like yesterday. I've got one more grandma and then I won't have anymore grandparents. What will that be like? I've always taken it for granted that my grandparents will always be there. Master Anakin is losing his last grandparent and then it's my turn. I know my Grandma is also going to be passing on soon. She's not in very good health. It's a scary thought to think about life without any grandparents in it for Master Anakin and I both. I am really glad we decided to have a family wedding now instead of elope like we were thinking of doing. Both our grandmas were able to be there to share in that day with us. It was a beautiful moment...us giving bouquets of flowers to each grandma and sharing a hug and kiss with them. Grandma A even caught the bridal bouquet! She caught it pretty fast for being in her 90's. This video really affected me and moved me to tears. It was the first time I ever heard it and came on just as I was doing some reflecting. It made me think so much about life and how fast the last 35 years have gone by. My kids are growing up and I'm getting older and starting to lose people in my life. I miss Master Mark....I miss my grandparents...I miss Uncle A...and the different pets also that have passed away through the years. One day it's going to be me in a hospital waiting for my turn to die. It will be me thinking that life went by so fast and that I should have done this...or should have done that. As Kenny Chesney says...you better not blink... "I turned on the evening news Saw an old man being interviewed Turning a hundred and two today Asked him what's the secret to life He looked up from his old pipe Laughed and said "All I can say is ." "Don't Blink Just like that you're six years old and you take a nap and you Wake up and you're twenty-five and your high school sweetheart becomes your wife" "Don't blink "You just might miss your babies growing like mine did Turning into moms and dads next thing you know your "Your better half" Of fifty years is there and then And you're praying God takes you instead Trust me friend a hundred years goes faster than you think don't blink" "I was glued to my tv when it looked like he looked at me and said "Best start putting first things first." Cause when your hour glass runs out of sand You can't flip it over and start again Take every breathe God gives you for what it's worth" The pictures I am putting up today are from Sunday. We got in the car and went for a drive with our children to get away from it all and get our minds off of things for a while. The day had been very stressful and upsetting for Master Anakin and I both. It was a sunny day and we knew we didn't have long until the sun was going to set. We drove to White Rock Beach and took the kids to the park and beach there. I love to go to the beach to clear my head when I am needing escape. We love to go to White Rock. It was so beautiful at the beach with a perfect sunset and Master Anakin took some amazing pictures. I held onto Master Anakin while we watched the beautiful sunset with our children playing on the beach in the sand and I thought of how lucky I am. Life is precious and I should hold onto what I have in my life. Hold onto the wonderful family we have and hold onto the deep true love that Master Anakin and I have together. It was a really surreal moment and it touched me deeply. It was a truly beautiful moment in my life. One that I will never forget. May the force be with you all!! ~padme amidala

Difficult days for the Skywalkers

Today has been a pretty difficult day for me. Very emotional and upsetting. I am not sure how much I will be blogging the next while. It's very hard to write right now with everything that is going on with Master Anakin's grandma. We found out that the cancer has spread up into her brain. It's not a very good situation and it's deeply affecting Master Anakin and his family. Although she was older and this isn't a surprise, it is still upsetting and difficult to go through. We are going to sit our children down tonight to tell them that their Great Grandma is dying. This is going to be a difficult talk to have with them but we want them to be prepared for what is going to happen. Our kids have been lucky that they havn't had to deal with death yet in their lives yet. Leia was too young to understand when my grandparents passed away. I am not sure Skywalker will understand it all as he is only 6 years old. Leia seems to understand that something is wrong and asking a lot of questions. Tonight isn't going to be easy. I'm worried about how this will affect our children. Dealing with a death of a Great Grandma they are close to will be hard for them, especially for Leia as I am sure she is old enough now to really know what is happening. I'm worried about Master Anakin a lot. He is keeping a lot inside right now but I can tell he's upset about this. I wish I could take the pain away and make it better for him. I know he loves his Grandma so much and that he is very sad about this. I hope he knows that I am there for him right now through this and that we can get through the difficult days together. Our force is strong. He was there for me during difficult times and now it is my turn to be there for him. I hope he will lean on me and know he is loved and that I want to take care of him through this. I love him more than anything in the world and I would do anything to make him feel better right now. My thoughts have been with him all day today. Thank you to everyone who has shown support and been there for us with these difficult days. I am not sure how much we will be blogging or on the computer with this going on. HNT will be postponed this week. I hope everyone understands but this is a difficult time for Master Anakin and he needs to be with his family right now. His mom especially is really going through a tough time and I feel bad for her. Losing a mom at any age is very difficult for anyone. Master Anakin and I have our 11 year anniversary (of how long we've been together) coming up and I am not sure how this is going to affect that. We won't be having any sitting for a while and I am not sure now if we will even be celebrating it or not. It depends on what happens. Right now we are waiting for the phone to ring at any time to hear the news. It's left our lives a bit up in the air. I feel like this blog is a bit up in the air right now too. I'd like to blog but my mind is on this situation right now. I tried to read a few blogs today but I can't concentrate. I will try to blog when I can but I need to be Master's force right now when he needs me the most. May the force be with you all!! ~padme amidala

Daylight spanking time

It's been a weekend full of ups and downs. We got some good family news and also some bad news. I found out my sister is engaged recently. She wants to marry in the next year and move far away. A wedding is now being planned. I'm sad she is moving away but I'm happy about her news about the wedding. We found out some really bad news about Master Anakin's grandma also this last week. She hasn't been doing very well the last year. She is turning 94 this month and she is close to passing away. The family signed a DNR (do not resuscitate) order yesterday. There are some difficult decisions being made right now. Master Anakin is very close to his grandma so this is very hard for him. I'm trying to be there for him right now. Right now he is at the hospital probably saying goodbye to her. It could be the last time he sees her. My thoughts all weekend has been of his grandma and of worry for Master Anakin. I really hate seeing him upset and have spent a lot of the weekend cuddling and I'm trying to take care of him. He's always been there for me when I've gone through difficult times. I am worried about him today. I wish I could be there at the hospital too but I have to watch our children today and it would probably too be too difficult for them to be there in that situation. We may not be on the computer as much the next while with this going on with Master Anakin's grandma. I hope that everyone understands if we are not able to blog as often or if we disappear for a few days. This is a difficult time for Master Anakin and his family. We did play a bit on Friday night but Master Anakin wasn't in the mood to go to the darkside. I wasn't expecting any play last night. I figured he would be too upset to play. He had been so quiet all day and I expected us to cuddle up for the night. We both wanted to stay up to change the clocks back for daylight spanking...whoops I meant daylight savings time. We searched through channels to find something to watch on tv. Gone with the Wind was on. Master Anakin had never seen it before so he decided on that to watch. I drank my merlot and he had some coolers and we curled up together to unwind for the night. I lit candles around the room that smelled like pumpkin spice. I was hoping we would escape into a movie and get our minds off of things. He put my leash around my neck. I love to have that on while watching movies together. Makes me feel owned. We watched Gone with the Wind in the candlelight and snacked on some food I had made. I was happy to see Master Anakin get relaxed with his drinks and started to give him a neck massage while we watched the movie. I thought the movie might be too much of a click flick for him. I was surprised how into the movie he got. I've seen it a couple of times and I love that movie so much. Rhett Butler is quite the Dom. And Scarlett O'Hara is the ultimate princess with a bratty attitude. Master said to me several times through the movie how much she deserved a spanking. In one scene Rhett even threatens her with one telling her "You have her things packed ready for me in an hour, or I will warn you, I've always thought a good lashing with a buggy whip would benefit you immensely." You can see the scene on this You Tube video with him getting drunk and then taking her upstairs to fuck her and the next morning where he says that line to her about the lashing with the buggy whip. It is my favorite scene of the movie and it gives me goosebumps every time I see it. I mentioned to Master how I had always wanted a good lashing with the buggy whip. He said he didn't have one but he figured his homemade whip would be the next best thing. I was told to go fetch the whip and let off my leash to go to the bathroom or any getting ready for a whipping. I could tell he was hard and very turned on. I spent the rest of the movie over the pillow getting a hard whipping on my thighs, ass and back. He played with my pussy making it very wet during breaks from the whipping. At the end of the movie Master mentions to me that Rhett should have given Scarlett a lashing and that if he had, maybe there would have been a different ending to the movie. He would have gotten her into line and saved their marriage. He finishes the whipping with a few big spanks with his hand. He started to lecture me that I was exactly like Scarlett O'Hard with my princess ways and that spankings keep me in line. As the credit rolls from the movie, he turns me over and throws the pillow off the bed and enters me and we made passionate love together while he yanks on my leash hard. I could feel the whip marks on my body, the leash pulling hard on my neck, the subspace from the pain, the buzzed feeling from the merlot and his hard cock fucking me hard. mmmmm...I came with a huge orgasm after we fucked with the Hiatchi. It shook my body so hard that I was shaking and could barely walk to the bathroom to clean up. Master turned the clocks back and we headed to bed talking more about the movie before falling asleep naked together in each other's arms. I think we both had needed that escape and connection. This video from Gone with the Wind is going out to my sweet Anakin today. He is my "Rhett Butler" and he is the love of my life. I love him so much and hope he knows I am there for him right now through the difficult times. We reached 1.4 million hits this morning. That is quite the milestone for Journey to the Darkside. It seems like yesterday we were celebrating a million hits and opening our online store, Darkside Digital Arts. This is also blog post #900. Imagine that! That is a lot of posts. We really appreciate your support and comments so much! Thank you for joining us on our Journey. May the force be with you all!! ~padme amidala

Is Darth Vader wanting to play on the darkside this weekend?

I hope everyone enjoyed our Halloween pictures yesterday. I wanted to post two more pictures taken on Halloween during some play with Darth Vader. In my post yesterday I showed a picture of my erect nipple in the bath and today I am putting up one showing my tits glowing orange from the pumpkin candle holder and all soaped up. I think it makes for a very erotic picture. The other picture is me getting my Halloween spanking dressed in my naughty French Maid costume. Notice how red and welted my ass was after Darth Vader used his Anakin's paddle, homemade whip and belt on my poor bottom. This photo was taken over the pillow after some extra spanks were thrown in after a few sassy remarks after my fun spanking. He wasn't too impressed with my Princess attitude. I thought we were done with the spanking but he threw a pillow at the end of the bed and told me to get over it for more! Those last 20 with his belt were so intensely hard. Ouchies! I needed that pillow I was leaning over to sit on when he was done with me. Playing with Darth Vader always means a very welted marked ass which is hard to sit on. TGIF. What are your plans this weekend? Anyone else hoping for naughty play? Just looking at that picture of my spanked ass gets me feeling very aroused and craving a spanking. No one has ever spanked me the way that Master Anakin has. He knows the intense level of play that I seek. The subspace that I love to feel. The escape of a feeling truly owned and punished. I go to a different planet where only Master exists. Where my only purpose is to take His pain and hope for pleasure in return. Where he will push my limits and take me farther than I have ever been with anyone. I love playing on the darkside. I love that he can be sadistic with me and that he knows just how to play with me. Can you tell I am deeply aroused this morning? I've been chatting with the sexy Shasta Gibson this morning and she has been getting me really worked up! Talking to me about toy testing with me and about double-ended rabbits. *winks* It's been nice to escape into some naughty chat this morning with her. I enjoyed a phone conversation with her yesterday morning. I am so lucky to have such a special friendship with Shasta. I was telling her today that she does more toy reviews of any other blogger that I know. Please be sure to check them all out! Today she has a really good review on a leather paddle that I would love for Christmas. I hope Master Anakin will check it out and consider buying me one. That Anakin's paddle is wood and can make for major ouchies. I'd love to get a leather paddle as leather is my favorite. :) We added a new poll today on Journey to the Darkside. Please vote! We'd love to hear from you. I got the idea for this poll from one that Shasta did recently on her blog. I'm curious to know how long you have been reading our blog. Please vote on the poll on our side bar. I also did a blog post in our diet blog Journey to the Lightside today. I havn't been updating it very much. I will try to keep it updated more this month and keep focused on my goals. I really hope Darth Vader wants to spend some time on the darkside this weekend. We didn't play last weekend as I was on my period. I really want to play and escape into some naughty fun and darkside play with Darth. I am craving the pain...feeling masochistic and needy for his darkside ways. I hope he wants to get out the leash and put me on it and use and beat me. mmmmmm...I really need a spanking right now! Little miss dangerous is ready to play! This song is going out to Darth Vader at work today. It's the Hanky Panky (spank-me-mix) by Madonna. Maybe he can listen to it while I'm bent over his knee tonight waiting for his big hand to give my bottom some attention! "My bottom hurts just thinking about it" Please don't call a doctor, 'cause there's nothing wrong with me, I just like things a little rough and you better not disagree. 'Cause I don't like a big softie, [no], I like someone mean and bossy" I hope everyone has a very naughty weekend! May the force be with you all!! ~padme amidala

A very naughty Halloween

Thank you for everyone who voted on our poll asking everyone which HNT picture they liked the best...last years castle background vampire picture or this years dungeon background HNT picture. The winner of the poll was this years dungeon Vampiress picture with 100% voting for it. Thank you for all the comments and feedback. We are really glad you liked the picture. :) I had a really nice Halloween with some naughty play as well as wonderful family memories yesterday. Master Anakin surprised me by staying home all day and we were able to spend some time in the morning and early afternoon playing. I dressed up in my costume as a naughty French maid complete with my pink wig, skull thigh-hi's, black dress shoes and "spank me" panties and Halloween necklace. Master got a hard on as soon as he saw me. I am ready for trick or treating in the one picture carrying my pumpkin trick or treat container. You can see my red spanked ass in another picture from the Halloween spanking with Master's belt and homemade whip and Anakin's paddle. My "spank me" panties were pulled down and my ass was spanked very hard with the different spanking impliments. It was very much needed for both of us. We havn't had much spanking time lately and I missed feeling some pain on my ass. I went to DL's Halloween party with a sore bottom and wearing my cute little naughty French Maid outfit. I raised a few eyebrows from my friend, DL and her church friends at the party. I think perhaps I was dressed a bit too sexy compared to the other women. Maybe I should have worn a nun costume instead? *smiles* I caught DL's husband giving me some very sexual looks a few times in my costume. Imagine if they had known that underneath my sexy costume was a marked and welted ass and I was wearing "spank me" panties? I also didn't wear my bra with the costume as per Master's instructions. I know...I'm a very naughty girl. I can't help it. I felt like little miss dangerous last night. :) In the top picture was taken during a hot bath before the play. Master Anakin surprised me by taking this sexy picture of my erect nipple and pumpkin candle holder that was all lit up. Master said my skin had an orange glow from it for Halloween. He found it very erotic. You can click to enlarge the photos. We fucked and I had several orgasms during our play and I felt lots of stress relief from the last few weeks melt away in the bath, play and connection to Darth Vader. We took lots more pictures so stay tuned over the next week for those. We have a HNT picture also for next week that we took yesterday. My force feels strong today. I'm so glad the weekend is coming up. I'm hoping for lots more play and some catching up time with Darth. I would love for more play on the darkside. :) I hope everyone else had a very naughty and spooky Halloween!! May the force be with you all!! ~padme amidala