A journey through stressful times

It's been a stressful day for Master Anakin and his family. We have been waiting for news about my father-in-law who went in for major heart surgery today. There was a lot of risks and it has been very stressful waiting for news. I will twitter as soon as we know the results. The phone call could happen at any minute and we are waiting on pins and needles right now. I've never seen Master Anakin so upset as he has been the last few hours. I hope his Dad will be ok. My prayers have been with him. It has brought back some bad memories for me of my own Dad and his death. I wound up talking to A about some old memories of my Dad today. I have not been able to stop thinking about my Dad and it's put me into a bit of a dark place mentally. I think I am still processing my Dad's death. It hasn't been a year yet and sometimes I am still trying to pick up all the pieces that were left behind from his death. It's changed my way of thinking and lead to some very dark nightmares. I needed a beating and A was happy to give that to me today. He came over for a visit and we talked through lunch. It hasn't been an easy road for A and I. There have been a few issues which have been a bit difficult to work through. I feel that the odds are against us but I really hope we'll be able to stay together for a long time. I'm glad to have a new partner in my life. It's helping me through some tough times lately. I appreciate him coming over today to keep me company. I needed the distraction. We played and I asked him to "be mean to me". A is struggling a bit with this. I think sometimes I surprise him with how much of a pain slut I really am. I need pain to get wet. I need pain to connect with a partner. Pain is pleasure for me. I think A understood that after he beat my ass. I was soaking wet when he checked my pussy with his finger. He had been very Dominant during our play and it excited me when he got rough. We had some great sex and I got to cum for him with the Hitachi. We got to spend a bit of time together today too which was nice. .... It's been an interesting journey so far in 2010. This year has been a lot different than the last one. It's amazing how much can change in a year. Last year I was breaking up a poly relationship (with Shiro) and wasn't feeling very sure about the poly. I had no idea that my life was going to change in a very big way. My Dad passed away and I went through some major life changes in the last year. A has come into my life and other people have disappeared. I have no idea of the journey ahead in 2010. I feel there is major changes still to come. My fortune Cookie (which I got during my lunch with A at a chinese food place on Sunday) said "Now is the time". I can't help but wonder what that means. The force doesn't seem as strong as it a few weeks ago. I can't help but notice the dark wind on the horizon. A storm approaches and it's unclear what lies ahead on the journey.... May the force be with you all!! ~padme amidala